TODAY I LOST MY VOICE IN A CHAPEL QUIRE AND MY VIRGINITY IN A HOTEL ROOM OVERLOOKING THE FBI FIELD OFFICE A FEW HUNDRED FEET AWAY. I STRUCK OUT FROM A WOODED CABIN AT 5AM COVERED IN BUG BITES AND MAYBE RESIDUAL FIBERGLASS FROM SATURDAY. LUNCH WAS AN OVERSTUFFED BAR OWNED BY SOME COUNTRYPOP ICON WITH A FIRST AND LAST NAME. THE LEAD SINGER ASKED THE HORDE OF BACHELORETTES IF ANYONE WAS FROM THE CITY AND THE ROOM GOT THE QUIETEST I EVER HEARD IT. EVERY OTHER VEHICLE IS A BEER BIKE OR A PARTY BUS CRAWLING THE LENGTH OF THE BLOCK AND RAINING DOWN EDICTS LIKE PETTY FIEFDOMS. IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO REALIZE SHE WAS COMING ON TO ME. EVERYONES A TOURIST. I STARED AT THE CEILING ALL NIGHT.
THERES A ROW OF FOUR TVS LINED EDGETOEDGE ON THE WALL OF THE HOTEL LOBBY ALL SET TO DIFFERENT CHANNELS AND AT LEAST ONE IS ALWAYS SELLING A PILL OR A CREAM OR A FINANCE APP TO TURN YOU INTO YOUR BEST SELF. KIDS DRUMMED BUCKETS ON THE SIDEWALK FOR TIPS AND I NEVER FIGURED OUT IF THEY WERE ALLIES OR BITTER RIVALS. THE BLACK ISRAELITES WERE OUT WITH A STAGE AND A SCIENCE FAIR POSTERBOARD TITLED KLAN PARENTHOOD THAT HAD CUTOUT PHOTOS OF ABORTED FETUSES AND ONE OF OBAMA. I HAVE SEEN THE NUKES OF HEAVEN RAINING DOWN ON ISRAEL SAID THE ONE WITH THE MIC I HOPE EVERY ISRAELI GETS BOMBED. A DRUNK ON A PARTY BUS TRIED TO BRIBE ONE OF US INTO FLASHING HIM. WE STAGGERED AROUND OUR ROOM PAST MIDNIGHT KNOCKING MAKEUP ONTO THE FLOOR. MY OTHER ROOMMATE WANTS TO FUCK ASTOLFO AND THE PRESIDENT OF CZECHIA. IT WAS LESS EXCITING THE SECOND TIME AND PROBABLY EVEN LESS THE THIRD.
WE SANG. THERE WAS A DOG ON THE HIGHWAY WITH ITS GUTS SPLAYED OUT TO THE SUN. I THINK IT WAS A DOG. THE ONLY THING I COULD MAKE OUT IN THE KNOT OF RED WAS THE VAGUE OUTLINE OF A HEAD AND A PAW. TONIGHT IS A DIFFERENT HOTEL.
I CAME OUT TO MY MOM IN STOPPED TRAFFIC ON THE INTERSTATE. WE FOUND OUT WHAT IT WAS WHEN WE PASSED A FIREMAN SPEWING WATER OVER THE CHARRED BLACK HULL OF AN EIGHTEEN WHEELER. THE TRUCK STOP OFF THE HIGHWAY HAD NO BARRIER BETWEEN IT AND THE CORNFIELDS. I WAITED FOR THE TOILET WITH FIFTEEN OTHER PEOPLE BENEATH A MINT CONDITION THANK YOU FOR SOCIAL DISTANCING SIGN. SOMEONE HAD SCRATCHED A LETTER OFF THE BABY HANGING STATION. I STARED AT THE CEILING ALL NIGHT.